she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Randomize
