How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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