JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
