Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Shitshow foam night was such a success
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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