I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
there was a trapeze. enough said
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
