She's JV to your varsity
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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