Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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