Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
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