You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Randomize
