I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
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