two words: eviction party
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
