wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
