i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I understand Curling. That high.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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