if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
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