OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
4 words: hood of his car
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
im holly from the hills drunk
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Randomize
