i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
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