I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize