How'd it feel making her break her religion?
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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