Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
