he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
My cat gives me a boner
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
This is classic penis vs brain.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
