No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
