anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Randomize
