Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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