Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
