I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
