I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
This is the high leading the old right now
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
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