I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
50% drunk capacity currently
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
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