How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
