She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
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