I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
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