at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
