was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
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