there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
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