and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
You work out of a Hotel?
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Randomize
