So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
