I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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