what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
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