i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Randomize
