so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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