Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
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