Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
