But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
