Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
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