I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Randomize
