have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Randomize
