How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
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I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
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At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
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