Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
