my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
