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The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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