i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Houston, we have a squirter
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize