Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
